76 The Meadow At night Tobi calls again. I put my phone on silent and go to bed. He is at our house the next morning. Bunmi comes to call me from my room. My mother is seated in the living room conversing with him. “Your husband is here o,” she says when I come downstairs. I greet her but ignore him and seat on the chair opposite her, far from Tobi. “Oya. Go to your husband. He has come to apologize.” She comes over to me, urging me to go to him. I am a bit surprised that she isn’t telling me to apologize or kneeling at his feet, her lips almost touching his shoes, while he tells her in a patronizing tone to get up. When I don’t move or say anything, Tobi comes over to me. He seats next to me and puts his arms around me, pulling me closer to him. His scent fills my nostrils. He smells of honey and Dettol soap. He smells like home. Or at least what I think home used to be. “Sweetheart, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have hit you. Please forgive me,” he says in a soft tone. The same tone that in the past, caused butterflies to float around my stomach and wetness to form between my thighs right before he made love to me. This time his tone does nothing to me. I remain still, my back ramrod-straight. He tries again. “Bola mi, I’m sorry, nah. Please forgive me.” Bola mi was his special endearment for me. It meant My Bola. I wasn’t his Bola anymore. I wasn’t anyone’s Bola. This Bola wouldn’t allow herself to be killed by a man like Tobi. So, I stay still, unmoving. Eventually, Tobi leaves. He promises to return the next day. My mother is livid. She doesn’t speak to me for the rest of the day. At night I receive a text from Tobi. It is simple and short.
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